Pain Language


What would a pain language look like? Sound like? Written, I imagine on the body and the sheets, clothes and pillows, shit and blood. Projected like movies.A stuttering, irritated series of marks with an almost rhythm (always almost). For neuropathy it would be written on shoes and socks, gloves, the steering wheel, keyboard. Charred and raised red, engraved in boiling marks, for the sizzling sound that should be there. Like bare electrical wires hissing as they buzz and threaten out of sync.

The aching would be the terrible drone of wailing mourners, the white hot broken place that’s cool to the touch. The written words would loop and loop, letters  and symbols heavy, scribbled on top of each other, an indecipherable, weighty pile of muttering, whimpering pleasestoppleasestop.

The headaches a series of spikes and blades for letters, curved deep and deeper into the skin, the eyes, forehead, scalp. Too obvious? Fuck you. It’s always too obvious to me.

Migraine a scratched out, scribbled mass that throbs with the beat of another cruel heart. Laser-etched permanently in pulsing grooves carved in places that only the migraine can uncover again and again. Migraine grammar twists tighter and tighter until nothing escapes the knot, not even meaning.

Unified Theory Of Everything


My body used to be the entire world, the universe, until you happened to it and showed me that there were things out there that could also be in here. That there are things bigger than me that I am inside already. That I could be consumed and still live. You are still consuming me and I, you, like some binary system. But one of us is not always the black hole, the gravity sink, and one of us is not always the smaller star. We orbit. We erode.

How To Be A Body In Multiverse


Maybe dark matter/energy is moving faster than light, that’s why it is dark. So it can’t be in this universe.

Like you. You are always in darkness.

Always moving toward (away?), but never arriving.

No matter how much desire there is between us, folding space and time. Pulling us into that event horizon that is bigger than the universe. We are never touching. There is no stuff to touch. Scaling down and down, in and in, there are only fields of radiation moving against and through each other. That’s all touch is.

Maybe you are another universe.

With different physical laws.

And we are just trying to communicate and cohabitate in multiverse.